Nursery is COMPLETE!

      We have officially made it to the safe zone...37 weeks. And we are FINISHED with Elsirae's nursery. Aunt La made her some BEAUTIFUL curtains to complete the room. Now, if only I could convince the princess that her nursery is way more cozy than my womb...we could get this party started. She seems pretty content. I sure wish she was a little more like her daddy, in that he always has his "go britches" on. I suppose princesses are on their own time schedule and we shall have to endure patiently. Although, Momma is getting VERY impatient. Lord help!

July 8, 2013 @ 11:01 a.m.

     

     On this day, ONE WHOLE YEAR ago, our family was blessed with a precious, precious, PRECIOUS gift: Addison Virginia O'Neal. This little girl has a very special place in my heart, and has had a hold on that spot since the day I found out my sister was expecting her.
   
     I would be lying if I told you that when I heard the news I was happy. In fact, it was one of the most devastating announcements I have ever had to experience in my lifetime. Immediately, upon hearing it my heart exploded into a thousand pieces and the floodgates of tears were unleashed.

    Up to that point in my journey I had fought that devastating feeling with success. Up to that point, no one in my family had gotten pregnant. Yes, it was hard to see the friends around me growing swollen with expectant babies. Yes, those days induced some tears, frustration, anger, but none of them compared to finding out that my own sister would be experiencing motherhood before me.

    I knew in my gut that she was going to tell us she was expecting. I just knew it. I'm a nosy person. I asked. I ruined the surprise for Cierra. I'll never forgive myself for that...but at the time, that was the last thing on my mind. I remember the phone call like it was yesterday. Cierra was obviously upset because:
1. I had ruined her surprise
2. It was just as hard for her to reveal it as it was for me to find out (She knew about my struggle and my pain, and Cierra is a very tender-hearted, sensitive creature; always has been.

     So, when I answered the phone it was to the voice of her oh-so-perturbed-with-every-right-to-be over-protective-husband, Sean. He said, "Well, you ruined it. You were right. She's pregnant." Immediately, I felt guilt, shame, embarassement. But mostly, I was sad. So unbelievably sad for myself. I wanted to be the one to make that announcement. I wanted to be the one to surprise my family with a new addition.

    I immediately called Kevin, my wonderful supporter, who has never allowed me to wallow in self-pity, because I knew I needed a pep-talk. He comforted me as best he could, told me he loved me, and then hung up. Then I was alone. Just me myself, and I to deal with the tornado of emotions inside of me.

    I got to thinking, and praying, and I realized (very quickly) how silly I was being. I mean, this was CIERRA we're talking about. Sweet, innocent, docile, precious little Cierra. The one who God first allowed me to be a big sister to. I loved her so completely, there was no way I was going to let this get in the way.

    Cierra was always such a sensitive little fragile thing, even from birth. From the first moment I met her, I knew she would need protecting. So, that's what I became for her. That big, mean, over-bearing, older sister who was always there to fight her battles for her (just ask Sean). Mom always called her a porcelain doll. It was such a beautiful description of her. So, beautiful and fragile, you want to stick her up on a high shelf so no one could ever harm her.

    THIS was the Cierra who was telling us she was going to have a baby! THIS was the fragile creature who God saw enough strengh and faith in to bless her with a beautiful little miracle! How could I be so selfish as to taint this exciting time for her? With that little reminder, I was off to see my first little sister, to comfort her and let her know that I was okay. That I was happy for her. That I loved her...though it pained me greatly to do so.

    When we arrived at Cierra and Sean's house, they were expecting us, and had laid out the ultrasound pictures. Those pictures took my breath away. I fell in love with my niece. Never had I seen anything more precious, and I realized this was a God-sent gift to Cierra and Sean, but it was a gift to me too. I knew that this little baby might be the closest thing to a child I would have, so I made up my mind to pour all of my love into it that I possibly could.

     The day she was born was a day I will never forget. I saw her sweet face and immediately every single emotion I had ever experienced in my journey came bubbling up to the surface again. I held her and cried for what seemed like forever. For my pain. For my happiness. For my very brave little sister. Because that baby was so beautiful and precious. Because I thought I was as close as I was going to get to that experience. But all that pain was worth it to hold that little miracle-girl. She was so beautiful, and fragile, and precious...just like her momma. And just as I did on the day I met Cierra, I knew that this was a little girl that I would go to battle for.

     She has grown so much in just a short year! She has brought so much joy to our lives!!! Her little personality is really starting to shine and I can see her momma's strength in her. But I can also see her momma's beautiful sensitive spirit. That spirit that captures everyone around her. I'm so proud to be her Aunt Hay (if you can't already tell from my newsfeed)!

      I know as my little Addi V is introduced to her equally precious cousin Elsirae, there will be a major adjustment period, for ALL parties involved. But I also know that they're going to be two peas in a pod before long...just like Cierra and I. I'm sure very shortly the gang will be growing my leaps and bounds, and I'm so excited that I get to participate in that! God is SO good! He is SO faithful!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY PRECIOUS ADDISON VIRGINIA!!! 

I love you more than words can say!

<3 Aunt Hay

It's CRUNCH Time!

     Yea, Yea...technically I still have 3 months to go, BUT I'm a planner. I like to plan. I like to be prepared. This part of my personality drives my husband CRAZY...probably because all my "plans" are for him to do various chores for me. What can I say...I have the vision, and no skill. Lucky for me my talented hubby has a knack for interpreting my vision and making them a reality. For this (and many other things) I am thankful...he not so much.

     Anyway, it's July and TODAY is the day that I begin the LAST trimester of this pregnancy!!! I can't believe it! The first trimester went by so fast! The second one slowed down a great deal. I imagine this last trimester will d-r-a-g...kind of like my body these days. Kevin has always told me how slow I am about doing anything. Well, he now jokes that this pregnancy has made me EVEN slower...poor guy. It's no joke though. Everything takes more time and effort these days.

    Our little lady has been quite a bit more active lately. It feels so weird when she starts going crazy in the-balloon-that-is-my-belly; especially when she decides to drag a fist or foot across my swollen mid-section! It feels like there's an alien in there about to bust out. I made Kev feel it one night...it freaked him out. Poor guy, he's not into this pregnancy stuff any more than I am.

     I always thought I would be one of those women who thinks pregnancy is a "magical" and "euphoric" time; especially considering all I went through to experience it. Well, I mis-judged myself. I'm not a fan. Not that I haven't enjoyed nurturing my sweet girl for the past 7 months. I really enjoy feeling her move, just because it's SUCH a reality check. But I am NOT enjoying the fat-feeling I get every time I look in the mirror. True, most of the weight I've gained has been pure baby, but I just am not one of those girls who looks at my belly and thinks "oh, how sweet/cute/precious". I'm one of those who is just ready to hold my sweet baby in my arms rather than my belly. Oh well...we've got a waaaays to go!

     But, I digress. Back to the planner in me...it's JULY and I've vowed to myself to finally work on my baby girl's room. (Up to this point...not a thought. Granted I have been SWAMPED with wedding festivities and summer vacations). So, when Kev and I returned from our anniversary trip, we got started.

     We decided to leave the room the original color (since we just moved in and it was JUST painted) and instead paint only an accent wall. Where does the modern-girl turn for inspiration? Pinterest, of course! I started digging for inspiration and found this:

      When I finally convinced Kev to go paint it for me, I was so very pleased with how it turned out! Here are some photos of Daddy working on Elsirae's accent wall:

      On top of being a planner, I am also a shopper...a thrifty shopper. I like to find good deals. Truthfully, I like to find GREAT deals. I was bound and determined NOT to pay an outrageous amount for furniture that my child will only use for a few years. So, I called up my mom and my sister Leah and we went thrift store shopping. Yes, you read correctly. Thrift. Stores. We found some really great treasures, including this beautiful little blue chest:

      I also snagged this adorable vanity, and wardrobe. Kevin and Uncle Griff gave both pieces a fresh coat of paint and they look like new!

      Gigi and Boots wanted to contribute to the madness so they bought our princess her crib, and Aunt Leah helped me put it together (while Daddy was out playing with dirt bikes)! It turned out beautifully!

     I found the glider at Babies-R-Us on SALE! I had to get it, because I was really determined to get a glider that looked like a normal chair so that it could be moved around the house as needed when I no longer have a nursery. This particular glider was way cheaper than the ones I was planning to splurge on.

    All-in-all I think it's coming together nicely! Now, we're just waiting on the bedding (which should be delivered any day now), and Aunt Lauran to sew us some curtains to match! I'll be so relieved when it's done because, I want to be prepared just in case the princess decides to grace us with her presence earlier than expected. We shall see!!!

The Hardest Part...

    
    
     Today is our 6th anniversary!!! I've been legally and biblically bound to my Prince for 6 wonderful years!!! It's hard to believe these years have flown by so fast! So much has changed. We have grown so much, individually and as a couple. I always wondered how it was possible for things to "get better" after your wedding; now I can see it. Each year has been better than the last with Kevin...and that is the honest truth. 
    
     As I sit here today and reflect on the 6 years of wedded bliss we've experienced so far, I can't help but be reminded of so many things: the good, the bad, the ugly, the beautiful, the wonderful, the peaceful moments we've shared thus far in our journey together. I wouldn't trade a single one. I would rather spend all my bad days with John Kevin Boatwright than all my good days without him. He is my reason for being, my sanity, my comfort, my protector. 

     You see, I've had a slightly tainted sense of love for the majority of my life. The men in my family are very "old school", as in Pioneer-Days-Old-School. They believe a woman's place is in the home, submissive to her man in EVERY way...which I agree with to a certain degree. But because of this, that is how I understood God's love to be: firm, domineering, demanding, harsh, forceful, retributive, and God forbid you give an opinion or feeling that goes against their opinions or beliefs. (Now, I will say the men in my family have definitely evolved from their cave-man states of mind...but it has taken time. And while they were evolving, so was my opinion of love.) I didn't understand why anyone would want to be "loved" in this way by man or God. I went through the motions, like the good-girl I was, not ever fully desiring or wanting to be involved with this "god" who would treat women with such a lack of appreciation.
     
     Enter Kevin. His love was obvious, relentless, and unconditional right from the start. I was so shocked by this new brand of love that I didn't know what to do with it. So, what do we humans usually do with unfamiliar emotions we're afraid of? We fight it. That's exactly what I did. I fought Kevin's love. I pushed back with all I had trying to get him to "go away" with his unfathomable love. He finally looked at me and said, "Halley, I love you and I'll wait for you. It doesn't matter how long it takes. I'll wait for you." 
     
     That did it. It broke down my huge-fortress-of-an-emotional-wall. It came crashing down around me and in it's place was this beautiful understanding of what the Love of Christ REALLY is. The Love of Christ is beautiful, obvious, relentless, and unconditional. I can see that now, and I have spent the last decade of my life getting used to being loved that way by Jesus through my perfect husband.
   
     I have cherished every second. It's still so new to me...I mean, when you think about it who can honestly get used to that type of love? Especially one so undeserving as me? But that's it. That's the point. Grace in a nutshell. Love in a nutshell. My husband in a nutshell. My God and Savior in a nutshell.
  
     I have been blessed the past 25 weeks of my pregnancy. There have been no crazy adjustments. No aches, pains, or sicknesses. Just a gradual swelling of my belly. The hardest part for me will be adjusting to life where I have to share Kevin's love. I think about it every day...especially considering this is a little GIRL we're bringing into the world together. How will I share him with her? 
  
     I think I'm about to learn a very great lesson...again. I think God is going to show me how He loves us all completely without sparing an ounce of love for anyone. I'm nervous, but I'm excited about it. God has taught me so many things through this man He has allowed to be my husband. I am so grateful to Him in His infinite wisdom for that. I am also incredibly grateful to my husband, the-willing-vessel, who has allowed himself to be used by God to love silly little me.
     

     May this next part of our journey be just as filled with love as the past six years! I love you John Kevin Boatwright! 

                           Happy 6th Anniversary!!!

Father's Day!

     

     My Daddy and I don't always see eye-to-eye. In fact, the occasions are rare when we do. I think it's likely because we have many similar personality traits...some good, some not-so-good. Despite that, I'm grateful that I get to call him "Daddy" because without him, I wouldn't be the woman I am today. He too has taught me many important life-lessons which I will cherish eternally; a few of which I will share with you here:

1. Early to bed, early to rise. My daddy has always been a hard worker. Sun-up to Sun-down. Never quit. NO matter what (injury, illness, and exhaustion are no excuse. Nowadays neither is old age).
2. Tithe regularly and give generously. You can't out-give God.
3. If you want answers, go find them. But make sure you're looking in the Bible...the only true source of wisdom.
4. Give nothing unless it costs you something. Self-sacrifice is an important gift to give.
5. Look for those in need...help them any way you can. Eventually, they will look for you and toward God.
6. You can't take money with you...so put it to good use.
7. Don't be quick to accept answers and opinions. Investigate for yourself, line-it up with the word of God, and then defend it.
8. Take your children to church.
9. Family is important...stay close to them. They are your strongest supporters.
10. Pray for your children, out loud, where they can hear year. Nothing is more powerful than the prayers of a father.

      There are many other lessons that Daddy has taught me over the years, these are just my favorite ones. The thing I am most grateful for, is that my Daddy helped to mold and shape the man of my dreams; the one whom my children will call "daddy".

      This is Kevin's first official Father's Day! He's probably not as excited about it as I am though. The fact is, I am grateful to three special men for helping to shape the man of my dreams into the perfect father for my children: Kevin's Daddy (Jeff), Kevin's Papa (Mr. Hudson), and my Daddy. Each of these men has sown little seeds of wisdom into Kevin's life. Each of them have impacted Kevin in different ways, shaping him into the man I love.

1. Kevin's Daddy: Mr. Jeff has always been a quiet observer. He's non-confrontational; a peacemaker. He's also not a man afraid to express his feelings. Kevin inherited these qualities from him. I remember when we dated, Kevin would get in silly arguments with me or with his sisters. It wasn't uncommon for Kevin to find notes in his car from his dad gently reminding him that he was out of line. Mr. Jeff would always make sure that first and foremost Kevin knew how much he was loved. How very Jesus-like is that?! I'm so grateful to the loving and selfless example of love Kevin had in his father!


Kevin's Papa: Mr. Hudson was my next door neighbor. I got to see him interact with Kevin pretty much my entire life. Mr. Hudson has always been happy and energetic in all that he endeavors. Kevin is like that: happy and EN-ER-GET-IC!!! I love that about him! Mr. Hudson puts all of that happiness and energy into anything he attempts. That includes work as well as loving his family and his wife. If you were to be able to witness the relationship between Kevin's papa and nanny, you probably would think they were paid actors on the set of some movie, because their love is THAT unbelievable. They still behave like high-school sweethearts...and they've been married for over 50 years!!! I hope and pray Kevin and I will have a love like theirs.


My Daddy: Kevin and I were blessed to be able to grow up together. With that, comes the obvious possibility that we will learn lessons from each others families. Kevin was my brother's best friend...from birth, so he was at my house A LOT. At a young age, he began working with my brother in Dad's construction company. Kevin learned many skills, and many important work ethics there. He got to see how to run a business, interact with customers, and become quite the craftsman. Kevin and I are both grateful to my Daddy for all the wisdom he has imparted to us collectively and separately.


    The beautiful thing about these three men is that together, with Jesus shining bright inside of them, they have created a perfect husband and father: John Kevin Boatwright. They all have helped to mold a generous, selfless, energetic, hilarious, strong, hard-working, peace-making, man of God that I am so excited and proud to call the father of my children!!!

Happy Father's Day to all four of you! I love you DEARLY!!!!

My Lil' Katie Rae is MARRIED!!!

     These last few months have FLOWN by! Probably because I have been extremely busy with the wedding of this chick:

     On June 7th she got to marry the man of her dreams! I'm so happy for them both!!! No couple in this world deserves to be more blissfully happy. 

     Casi is the most generous and thoughtful person I know. She over-thinks EVERYTHING...including how she treats others. She also is the wittiest person I know. Never a dull moment with her. As my dad has said often, she is the "life" of the party...always has been. Always will be.

     Griff compliments her in every important way. We always joke with them and say we never thought anyone could out-talk Casi...well, she has met her match in Griff. Where Casi is high-strung and tends to over-analyze everything, Griff is the opposite. He goes with the flow. Nothing "tousles his feathers", so to speak...that is except Casi. That's the way it's supposed to be though. :)

Here are some sister shots from her showers:

These pictures are from her Bachelorette Weekend:

Here are some shots from the Rehearsal and Rehearsal Dinner:









And then...the BIG DAY:

Seriously though...don't they look sooooo good together?!

    Together they make a perfect pair. I wish them many years of happiness and wedding bliss! Here are some pictures from the BIG DAY!

Happy Wedding Day to an AMAZING couple!!! I love you both IMMENSELY!!!

Mother's Day!

    Today is the day we celebrate all the wonderful mothers out there. I know there are TONS and I'm a bit partial but...I'm convinced: I have THE BEST mother. She is an angel. A god-send. Closest thing to perfection on this Earth that I know of. My Momma is super selfless. She is constantly giving to others. She had 6 children. She had 5 of us in 7 years...then had a 5 year break before having her last one. (Whew! If she wasn't a selfless person, she probably wouldn't have survived.)
     I remember trips to the grocery store MANY years ago when we were all just itty bitty children. My mom would have 3 or 4 of us in/on the buggy while 1 or 2 of us walked around beside her (my youngest sister Leah wasn't born yet, so she didn't get to experience this excitement). She would shop for groceries (which let's face it, to feed the army that was her family was a LARGE amount) all while carting 5 of us around the store! I'm CERTAIN everyone who saw her felt sorry for her and never forgot her. We always made a game to see if we could sneak items into the buggy without her noticing before she paid for them and took them home. It never worked. You'd think all of her senses were occupied, but not Super Woman...couldn't get much past her! Still can't!
     As we got older, we began to involve ourselves in various extra curricular activities: soccer, cheerleading, church choir, church plays, dirt bike racing, horseback riding, etc. Not ONCE did my mother ever tell any of us that we couldn't participate in an event/activity that we wanted to. All six of us were involved in something ALWAYS! But you know, I never remember a time when my mother wasn't there to support me. She somehow found a way to be in 6 places at once. She was always the face I looked for in the crowd; always the arms I reached for after an event, especially if it hadn't gone like I wanted. On those days/nights when I wanted to quit, she would calmly listen, give me advise, and tell me that she wouldn't allow me to quit; that I was to always finish whatever I had started to the best of my ability. I resented that many, many, times over my childhood, but I appreciate it so much now. That was a life-long lesson that I needed to learn: perseverance in times of hardship. I have my momma to thank for that and SOOOOO many other things!          Throughout my childhood, I never remember my momma trying to be my friend...in anything really. She never tried to "make" me like her; never tried to buy/bribe my affection or loyalty. My momma never pushed me to be something I wasn't. She wasn't afraid to tell me the difference between right and wrong. She wasn't afraid to stand her ground and fight a battle with me, knowing that she knew what was best whether I liked it or not. There were many nights that I remember my momma crying with hurt feelings, frustration, exhaustion, but never did I ever have to wonder where she stood on any given matter. I was a stubborn child (to put it mildly). Of the 6 of us, I quite possibly, was the most dogmatic. However, I never became the "rebel" child that so many do during their high school and college years. I think, truthfully, it's because my momma would get truly, genuinely, deeply hurt by our failures. It crushed her. To see such a strong woman painted with pain, hurt, sadness because of ME...well that just did it for me. I couldn't do that to her. She already endured enough on my behalf. The pain she endured on my behalf makes me realize how much I love and appreciate her now.
     To this day, whenever I am upset about something, I will call her or go to her for advise. Momma never tells me what I want to hear. She never flat-out agrees with me. Instead, she forces me to see the world through different eyes; the eyes of whatever circumstance and/or person has peeved me. I tend to be ready with claws out running to the defense of those I love...not Mom. She helps me see things the way I should see them instead of the way I  want to see them. (I hope I can do this for Elsirae...I'll need prayer starting YESTERDAY!!!)
     I could go on for DAYS singing my Momma's praises because, I think, besides my husband she is my favorite person in the world! She has taught me many, many, things. I aspire to be a mother just like her to my precious Elsirae...Jesus, help me!!! Here are a few of my favorite lessons from my heroine mother:

1. Always put on make-up and a decent outfit before leaving the house. You never know who you will run into.
2. Appearances aren't everything, BUT you should always put forth your best effort.
3. Modesty is attractive.
4. Humility is attractive.
5. Be genuine always, saying what you mean and meaning what you say...but be considerate.
6. Love others, despite their many flaws.
7. Give selflessly, especially when you don't feel like it.
8. Pray constantly for those you love. Prayer WORKS!
9. Read your Bible and seek God daily...especially the book of Proverbs. Wisdom is the KEY! :)
10. Sing always. There's a song for EVERYTHING!!!
11. The Lord, Your God comes and goes before ALL others...ALWAYS!

     I know what you're thinking: this woman sounds a lot like Jesus. Well, that's because she is! Like I said...closest thing to Him that I know! Whenever I read Proverbs I'm reminded of my mother. Mostly because it's her FAVORITE book of the Bible, but also because chapter 31 verses 10-31 describe my mother in scary detail. She is THAT woman and I am so grateful to have been blessed to be the fruit of her womb! I love you, Momma!!! Happy Mother's Day!!!